BUS RIDE HOME

We stop at Trisha's trailer. "Bye!" she says, and hops off. The bus pulls away with a roar, kicking up a cloud of gravel dust that soon enough will settle back down on her sunbaked trailer and the cornfield next door. I look back and see her trying to cover her mouth with her Trapper Keeper.

The twin with the scar over his eye has let go of his brother. Now he's putting a dip of Skoal in his mouth.

"Hey," he says to me. "Which is better?"

The bus bounces along the edge of the road to make room for a farm truck passing the other way. Someone's books hit the floor.

"Massey Fergusons," I say.

"You don't know for shit," he says.

Then I let him have it: "John Deeres are for pussies," I say.

This isn't what the twins expected -- they didn't figure on anyone fighting back. I'm pleased with my success. I look the twin with the scar straight in the eye.

"Boys." Says the bus driver. "Watch your mouth."

All of us spin around and look to the front of the bus. The driver's got a big mirror fixed to his visor with bailing wire, so he's been watching the fight. His oily hair is flying around in the hot, dry wind. He's smiling, which I figure is a vote for me. I figure he agrees with me about John Deeres.

But the twins figure the driver's smile is saying something else. It saying that fistfights on the bus are okay -- just as long as you don't cuss.

"How do you know, does your daddy have a John Deere?" the quiet twin asks me. The twin with the scar laughs loudly at that, and gets up out of his seat, motioning for his brother to follow him.

The twins are heading up the aisle toward me. I think to myself: Why didn't I keep my big mouth shut? I mean, for one thing, I've never really been in a fistfight. On top of that, there are two of them, and only one of me, and they use Skoal.

From the front of the bus, I can hear Jo Linda giggle with nervous excitement.

The bus is loud -- the engine, the gravel, the wind. And maybe the driver's been watching the fight instead of watching the road, because suddenly he realizes he's taking the corner a little too fast. He hits the brakes hard, and the bus leans heavily to one side.

The quiet twin loses his balance and grabs his brother's shirt, pulling him to the floor.

Jo Linda shrieks, "Kevin!" -- that's the quiet twin's name.

The bus quickly straightens itself out, and the twin with the scar pulls himself up off of the floor ... but something's wrong. He appears worried. He touches his lip with his fingers. He looks a little green in the face.

Suddenly, everyone realizes what happened. He swallowed his Skoal.

"You swallowed your Skoal!" I shout. "He swallowed his Skoal!"

Swallowing your Skoal means just one thing: It means pretty soon, you're going to barf. This fight is over.

The twin with the scar turns slowly to his brother and mutters, "You're an asshole," and throws a weak punch.

The quiet twin dodges the punch and says right back, "No, you're an asshole." But his heart isn't really in it anymore. He's looking at Jo Linda.